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That throbbing vein of pure, baby-killing rage is a clear enough message right there: 'Enter At Your Own Peril.'



... which is why we're going to do something else for the time being even though it's just delaying the inevitable. Trying to be a man and talk to Iris NOW is utterly useless.

Granted, there doesn't seem to be a lot to do on the second floor tonight, what with about half of the team licking their Iris-inflicted wounds.



To the attic!



[Ogami]

Ah... no, I was just thinking that you might be here, and...


[Ayame]

Oh... is that so? That makes me a bit happy, that you'd come up here just to meet me.


----
[Ayame]

Though the fact that you didn't go look for me in my room says quite a bit about your reasoning capabilities.


[Ogami]

Well, you know, isn't it a bit more dramatic to have our fateful meetings up HERE, so that it'll all be a bit cooler when we're reminiscing about the good old days?


[Ayame]

I-- Ensign, THESE are the "good old days"?


[Ogami]

Each and every moment before my inevitable confrontation with Iris counts as the "good old days", Ayame-san.

----

[Ogami]

Um, Ayame-san...


[Ayame]

Yes...?




[Ogami]

Um... I'd like to return this photo to you.


[Ayame]

Oh my... you brought it up for me...


[Ogami]

Yes... I was thinking to return it to you as soon as possible, but there just weren't any opportunities...


----
[Ayame]

...


[Ayame]

You KNOW that if you do that too much, you'll go blind, right?


[Ogami]

I-- what?


[Ayame]

You know... feeding the monkey, spanking the turtle, skinning the lynx... that.


[Ogami]

What in the world are you talking about?


[Ayame]

Don't worry, Ogami-kun, there comes a time in every boy's life when he has to, you know, come. Or was it go?


[Ogami]

... no, seriously, you've lost me.


[Ayame]

Look, you... you must know what I'm talking about. I can see that the photograph looks sticky from here, and I can reasonably infer that ponytails turn you on, so--


[Ogami]

Oh, THAT. I, uh.


[Ogami]

I like eating sweets.


[Ayame]

... really now.


[Ogami]

I eat 'em all the time now. Ever since coming to the theater, sweets are the only thing that keep me sane.

----


----


[Ogami]

Eh... is it alright?


[Ayame]

I want you to have it, Ogami-kun. ... would that be a problem?


----
[Ogami]

But isn't it--


[Ayame]

No, seriously, keep it. I can SEE the coating of stickiness on the damn thing.

----

[Ogami]

No...


[Ayame]

Thank you, Ogami-kun.
Ah, that's right! I wonder if I might ask a small favor from you.


[Ogami]

Eh... what is it?


[Ayame]

That wooden box over there... I'd like you to put it as far back as possible.


[Ogami]

Ah... okay. There we go... it's pretty heavy, isn't it.


(THUD)

[Ogami]

Right... that's done. Could that box possibly have been...


----
[Ayame]

The bones of the brigade's previous would-be captains, yes.


[Ogami]

... blugh?


[Ayame]

No, I'm just kidding. You should have seen the expression on your face! I--


[Ayame]

... you can uncurl yourself from that fetal position now, Ogami-kun. And don't whimper like that, you're even starting to make ME feel sorry for you.

----



[Ogami]

Ayame-san...?



----


[Ogami]

Maybe it was my imagination... in any case, guess I'll return to the nightly rounds.




... good god, what IS that racket? It sounds like someone's been blowing on a goddamn foghorn in here--



[Ogami]

(Yeah, it's Kohran. To think that she'd fall asleep in a place like this...)




[Ogami]

It can't be helped. I'd better bring her back to a room.




[Ogami]

Kohran... sorry, this'll just be for a bit.




Ogami picked her up, half-expecting an avalanche of land mines, nerve gas canisters, and death-ray-shooters to drop out of her skirt-thing. Much to his surprise, it was just one power drill that nearly nailed his foot to the floorboards; thankfully, his screams of sheer agony were drowned out by Kohran's sonorous snoring.

[Ogami]

... huh? She's... lighter than I'd expected.


[Ogami]

.....


[Ogami]

Though she pilots a Koubu into battle as a member of the Flower Division,
I guess... she's still an ordinary girl...


----
[Ogami]

... as long as she keeps her mouth shut and isn't trying to break as many laws of science as possible.


[Kohran]

... ssssnnnRRRnnnnrrrrkkkkk...


[Ogami]

Fucking HELL, she snores like she's trying to choke herself to death.

----

[Ogami]

Now... where should I carry her to?




... creepy, but tempting all the same.



Ogami ultimately decided that while it would certainly be WORTH it to scare the bloody daylights out of KOHRAN for a change and/or to turn the tables on her, he doubted that the rest of the brigade would see the humor in his triumphant yelling of "Ha ha! Now it is I who is violating your personal space with a series of engineering tools!"

[Ogami]

Right, I'll carry her back to her own room. I mean, it's pretty close, anyway.




Ogami hesitated outside of Kohran's room. Not only did he dislike the thought of entering the room where he'd spent so many countless hours screaming, bleeding, and begging for his life, but he knew for a fact that Kohran would have the entire door wired like an Electrode with a hair-trigger bladder and too much coffee in its system.



... so he laid Kohran down on the ground and started slapping her cheeks.





[Kohran]

Wh... huh? This... ain't th' library. I'm in front o' my room...


[Ogami]

You'd fallen asleep in the library, so I carried you over here.
I thought it'd be bad if you caught a cold, so...




----
[Kohran]

Not that it matters too much 'cause I'm inoculated 'gainst every disease known t' mankind after accidentally injectin' myself with a cocktail of experimental serums, but it's a nice thought nonetheless!


[Ogami]

... really now.


[Kohran]

Well, 'course! That's how I became a super-genius, ya see.


[Ogami]

So... why didn't you release this cure-all serum...?


[Kohran]

Well, the side effects are a tendency towards pyromania, nearsightedness, and th' occasional bout of wakin'-up-in-th'-morning-in-front-of-my-own-desk-an'-discovering-that-I'd-constructed-a-giant-death-robot-in-my-sleep-itis.


[Ogami]

Guess you've conquered that last symptom, right? I mean, none of us have seen any death robots yet.


[Kohran]

Oh, that jes' means that ya haven't been lookin' hard enough.


[Ogami]

What.

----

[Kohran]

I jes' suddenly became sleepy while I was lookin' stuff up...


[Ogami]

You should just sleep soundly for the night. It's not good to push yourself.


[Kohran]

I guess you're right... in that case, Ogami-han, g'night.


[Ogami]

Yup, good night.




----
[Ogami]

Good night... FOREVER. Mwahaha... mwahahaha... HAAAAHAHAHAHAHA--


[Kohran]

Ogami-han... I can hear ya from in here. What th' heck're ya doin'?


[Ogami]

... I dunno, I just... I just wanted to be the one saying stuff like that for a change, you know?


[Kohran]

Don't worry, Ogami-han, I'm sure that day will come fer ya soon enough.


[Ogami]

Really?


[Kohran]

Oh, SURE, once I'm finished violatin' yer mind with my NEXT inventio--


[Kohran]

-- er, but nevermind that.

----



[Ogami]

Ayame-san... I wonder if she's in her room.




[Ogami]

Um... Ayame-san. Could I have a moment?


[Ayame]

That's fine; come on in.




[Ogami]

No... that's not the reason...


[Ayame]

I see...


Translation: you don't fool me one bit, little boy. I can read you like a book! A BOOK, I say!

[Ogami]

Ayame-san... it's about Iris...


[Ayame]

Ogami-kun... do you dislike Iris?


[Ogami]

Eh...?


----
[Ogami]

Look, I've said this too many times to count; it's not "dislike," it's "scared shitless by." You of all people should know this by now--


[Ayame]

Just answer the question.

----



Clearly, the designers of this game felt that this was a necessary option.

 If you choose this option, Ayame sees nothing wrong with you and, in fact, will fully support your decision.  



[Ogami]

No, it's not that...


[Ayame]

... do you like her?


----
[Ogami]

...


[Ogami]

Permission to speak freely?


[Ayame]

Go for it.


[Ogami]

Are you out of your ever-loving mind?


[Ayame]

Look, it wouldn't be THAT bad. She's only ten years younger than you, if not more! Why, just think- when you turn thirty, she'll still be a hot young thing at twenty!


[Ogami]

First of all, that's STILL wrong, secondly, you're frightening me and destroying my confidence in the Flower Division's command structure, and thirdly, I'd be spending seven years introducing all of my friends and my older sister to a frighteningly underaged girlfriend.


[Ayame]

It'd be like one of those princess raising simulators! Except without the mammary-enhancing medication.


[Ogami]

It'd also be without the multiple endings. You'd just end up with "Demon Lord."

----

[Ogami]

Maybe....


----
[Ogami]

... I'm just extremely frightened of her, as opposed to scared shitless.


[Ayame]

At your own pace, Ogami-kun.

----

[Ayame]

In that case... that's fine, isn't it. I think that Iris also likes you, Ogami-kun.
Ogami-kun... please be honest with yourself.


----
[Ayame]

You're a loving loliphile, aren't you.


[Ogami]

I AM NOT.

----

[Ayame]

I believe that... Iris wants to know your honest feelings.
It's very important that you convey the fact that you like her.


[Ayame]

Please do your best, Ogami-kun. I'm sure it'll work out.


[Ogami]

Really?


----
[Ogami]

You mean I won't end up a bloody smear on the pavement?


[Ayame]

Whoa there, let's not get ahead of ourselves.

----

[Ayame]

Hmhmhm... yes, really. Now, please do your best, alright!!


Ogami took the superfluous exclamation mark as his cue to leave.


NEXT TIME: A longer update!


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