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VIDEO ALERT!

Introduction to the battle!

Google Version!
Youtube Version Coming Soon.

"Ah, the new year. A time for contemplation, rest and relaxation, and a feeling of goodwill for your fellow man. Why should 1924 (or the thirteenth year of the Taisho era, as they counted it in glorious Nippon!) have been any different?

"It was not to be, however, as the sudden reappearance of a new cabal of demons (led by the previously unaccounted-for Aoi Satan) was more than enough to rouse the proud members of the dauntless Imperial Assault Force's Flower Division from their well-earned vacation. These brave warrior-maidens (and their equally brave warrior ticket-taker) immediately suited up into their steam-powered fighting machines and sallied forth to meet the insidious Kouma in front of the Meiji Shrine.

"Everyone expected their New Year's wishes for peace to come true, and that the Flower Division-- they who had saved the Imperial Capital from an even greater threat three months prior-- would be able to deal with these otherworldly demons in no time flat.

"However...*"


- Excerpt from the 1977 edition of "Samurai Spirits: The History of the Flower Division," written by M. Sunnyside.


*In case you haven't noticed by now, the author has as much of a flair for the unnecessarily dramatic as he does for his love of all things Japanese.

One can only guess as to why he was so needlessly dramatic this day. It may have to do with the fact that he wrote this particular excerpt on the founding day of something that remains very dear to Sunnyside's heart. Readers who are well-versed in America's recent history should know exactly what I am talking about here.

... and yes, he actually ends the chapter exactly like that.
- L. Altair.

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TAISHO ERA, 13th YEAR: JANUARY
MEIJI SHRINE




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[???]

Um. Lord Satan, shouldn't we have ordered our Kouma to attack the humans while they were still running toward their robots?

[Satan]

Pshaw, our demons wouldn't have made it in time.

[???]

But... the Kouma were in perfect disembowelment range! They had the humans surrounded!

[Satan]

Look, it's a well-known fact: no matter how pressing the situation, humans always have time to suit up or transform. It's one of those racial bonus things.

[???]

But--

[Satan]

Seriously, guys, chillax. We've already been waiting for months, a few more minutes won't freaking kill us!

[???]

It killed Tenkai, didn't it?

[Satan]

That didn't count, evil old men ALWAYS die. Evil pretty men, on the other hand, live forever. It's science fact.

[Satan]

Now shut up, I wanna watch the last introduction sequence that they'll ever have.

----



Robot roll call!



Sakura! ("SPRING IS ALL ABOUT SUPER KAWAII CHERRY SAKURA BLOSSOM MORNINGS!!!!!")



Sumire! ("I will have to reprimand those foolish fools who foolishly fool around with those foolishly accursed lights.")



Maria! ("We are all but bullets, ammunition for the Imperium's grand battle against the heretical xenos demons.")



Kanna! ("Things to do: kill kill kill kill lunch... kill kill kill kill afternoon tea... kill kill kill kill quick shower kill kill kill kill... man, I love my schedule.")



Iris! ("Let's play Monopoly! You can be the doggy, and I'll be the car that smashes it to paste. Tee hee.")



Kohran! ("Aw yeah, makin' it cool t' be Made In China since 1923!")



And, of course...



O!



GA!



MI! ("Yes! I kind of have a girlfriend now sorta maybe! Screw everyone who thought that I'd grow up to be a forty year old virgin!! Now how the fuck do I lose my virginity")

[Everyone]

The Imperial Assault Force has arrived!




----
[Satan]

Actually, we're just passing through. Our real destination's Osaka.

[Ogami]

Really? Uh... okay, that's cool, I guess. Do you have anything to declare for customs?

[Satan]

Actually, we're all carrying more than three ounces of--

[Satan]

-- LIQUID WHOOP-ASS!!

[Ogami]

Well then, if you won't put it back in your checked luggage, I'm going to have to deport you back to your favorite destination:

[Ogami]

WE-BEAT-THE-CRAP-OUT-OF-YOU-VILLE, POPULATION: YOU!!

[Sumire]

For God's sake, Maria, can you please shut him up?

[Maria]

... technically, I can, but refusing to get involved in this mind-numbing idiocy in any way, shape or form was one of my New Year's resolutions.

----



... the fact that none of these mid-bosses have any VOICES during their first big debut is really a testament to how little the developers cared for the poor bastards.

[Ino]

My name is Ino! One of the Three Knights! We shall meet again! If most of you are still alive, that is!


In case you couldn't guess, "Ino" means "boar."



... and yes, every demon has their own dramatic entrance/exit.

Did you honestly expect anything less from Japan, the land of the showboating action sequences?



Shika means Night Elf druid "deer."



----
[Kanna]

Ha ha, lookit that, they're all making like trees and l--

[Sumire]

No, Kanna.

[Kanna]

But they're totally leaf-ing--

[Sumire]

NO, Kanna.

[Kanna]

Spoilsport.

----



[Chou]

Ohohohohohoh. And all of you should thank God that you were able to meet me once before your deaths.


Butterfly!



----
[Kohran]

... waitasec, ain't Boar-Deer-Butterfly a pretty high-rankin' combo in the Koi Koi card game?

[Satan]

Well... yes. Yes, it is.

[Kohran]

So yer tellin' me that ya actually spent th' time t' look specifically fer a group of mid-boss lackeys that had a cutesy theme goin' on?

[Satan]

Look, I don't want to be told that by someone who's part of a group where everyone's named after flowers.

[Kohran]

...

[Kohran]

Yer jes' mad that y'all got your ass beaten down by a buncha pansies, ain't--

[Satan]

No I am not shut up.

[Kohran]

... flower power~!

[Satan]

STOPPIT!!

----

[Ogami]

Satan, get down here! We'll finish what we started in Ueno Park!!




[Satan]

These creatures should provide more than enough entertainment for you. Now then, pardon me...




Man, won't villains in this series ever learn that leaving a group of heroes with a bunch of cannon fodder never works?



... nevermind the fact that there are a lot of them.


----

----

----


And nevermind the fact that holy shit lookit those teef.



KOUMA



[Ayame]

They're different from any enemy you've encountered before! Be careful!


[Ogami]

Got it... let's go, everyone! We're taking out the Kouma!!


[Everyone]

Understood!



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