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When we last left our heroes, they were...



... staring, dumbstruck, at the scene of the greatest massacre of robots that this world has ever seen.

[Ogami]

This many have been destroyed... what in the world... what happened here?


[Sumire]

P... perhaps Kanna-san... had been defeated by some large mass of Wakiji...


Possible, but unlikely. I mean, really now-- if they were to find Kanna's body, it'd have to be on top of a mountain of dismembered body parts.

[Kanna]

Gyaaaaaah--!


[Ogami]

Kanna!?




[Ogami]

... I'm sure you must be worried, but you should stay here, Sumire-kun! I'll go check it out!




Yes, Ogami, let's leave the person who is least able to defend herself without any weapons all alone, in a mansion that has been CONFIRMED to have Wakiji running willy-nilly.

[Ogami]

I know!




I was kind of expecting a little more... y'know. Decapitation and/or body parts strewn all over the hallway, maybe coupled with a few still-alive but horribly dismembered Wakiji plastered here and there.

Kanna always DID have an artistic side to her.

[Ogami]

Where are you, Kanna! Please say something!!


[Kanna]

C... Captain...


[Ogami]

There!? Wait for me, I'm coming over!


There's something innately frightening about facing down whatever monstrosity's enough to stop Kanna dead in her tracks. She swims through the ocean as easily as most men walk through the park! She crushes skulls between her index fingers! And for crying out loud, she just finished crushing legions of Wakiji!

What the hell could possibly cause her enough distress to--



[Kanna]

Captain! Save me!! It... it's a snake--!!


[Ogami]

... a snake?


[Kanna]

... table! There's a snake on the table--!!


----
[Ogami]

... a snake?


[Kanna]

That's what I SAID!!


[Ogami]

Does it... does it breathe fire, or instantly turn you to stone by glaring at you?


[Kanna]

No!


[Ogami]

Any means of mass-murdering entire cities? Soul-twisting power of the underworld seeping through its very pores?


[Kanna]

NO! IT'S JUST A SNAKE! WHAT'S SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT THAT!?


[Ogami]

W-well, if you insist...

----



[Ogami]

Kanna, are you alright!? I'm going to chase away the snake!


[Kanna]

... hurry! Please hurry, Captain!!


----
[Ogami]

But if it lops off my arm or anything--


[Kanna]

CAAAAAPTAAAAAIN--


[Ogami]

Fine, alright, regular snake. Right. Just wanted to make damn sure that whatever thing has defeated you isn't something that could crush my head with its index fingers.

----

[Ogami]

There... go away!




[Ogami]

Kanna! The snake's gone, so hurry up and get down from there!!


[Kanna]

Aah... hold on a sec... m, my lower back's giving out...


----
[Ogami]

What the fuck kind of martial artist ARE you!?


[Kanna]

One powerful enough to wrap her legs around this chandelier so strongly that they're the only thing keeping this thing from crumbling!


[Ogami]

You CRUSHED the chandelier!?


[Kanna]

I WAS SCARED!!


[Ogami]

Christ, this just keeps getting better and better. Well, there's nothing left but to--

----



[Ogami]

Now... Kanna. I'll carry you down, so... hold on to me.


[Kanna]

Eh...
I-in that case... I'm counting on you.


----
[Ogami]

Kanna, seriously, there's no need to blush. I'm just carrying you down, there's nothing platonic or romantic about this at all.


[Kanna]

... look, Captain, even if you say THAT...

----



----
[Kanna]

How the hell is this NOT romantic?


[Ogami]

Look, man, it's not MY fault that you're blushing like that!


[Kanna]

You keep staring into my eyes with that loving expression, how am I SUPPOSED to react!?


[Ogami]

I kind of HAVE to! I'll be staring straight into your cleavage if I tilt my head even a few inches down!


[Kanna]

... DAMN this's awkward.

----

[Ogami]

There... Kanna, everything's alright now.


[Kanna]

S... somehow, this is making me blush. Sorry 'bout this, Captain... I'm... pretty heavy, aren't I?


[Ogami]

Don't worry about something like that. Kanna, I'd be worried more about you getting hurt if you pushed yourself in getting down from there.


[Kanna]

Captain...


[Ogami]

See... I'll put you down slowly... see? There's nothing to be scared of, right?


[Kanna]

Yeah... this kinda thing... it ain't half bad.


[Ogami]

See... we're almost to the floor. You'll be fine from here.


[Kanna]

Aah... thanks. But I... want to stay like this for just a bit longer.


[Ogami]

Kanna...


[Kanna]

Heheheheheh... just kidding. You really helped me out, Captain.




A quick look at the complete and utter devastation that Kanna has wreaked before we return to the conversation at hand.



[Ogami]

I get the feeling that your fear of them isn't a trival matter, Kanna...


What tipped you off first? The fact that the Herculean martial artist jumped all the way up to the ceiling and attached herself to a chandelier at the sight of a snake 1/10th her size, or her panicked screams?



[Ogami]

A reason...?




----
[Ogami]

... you've got to be kidding me.


[Kanna]

Shut up, Sumire's just a damn copycat.

----



[Kanna]

Ever since I was a kid, it was training, training-- anyways, training...
I'd never once heard anything other than karate come out of my old man's mouth.




[Kanna]

Running after my father's back...
I was jealous of other kids who were playing and having fun...




[Kanna]

One day, when my father had gone out, I was practicing karate as always...
At that time, I got bitten by a snake.




[Kanna]

Getting bitten by a snake... and becoming alone, just like I was at that time...
When I think of it, I get uneasy... and frightened...


[Ogami]

So that's how it was...


[Kanna]

Heheheh... 's laughable, ain't it. Even with a body this big, I ended up screaming like a child.




[Ogami]

Not at all. No one'd laugh at you, Kanna!


Not if they want to LIVE, they wouldn't.



[Ogami]

Everyone has a hard past or something they're scared of... that much is just natural.






















WAIT, WUT



THAT POSE, WHA

[Ogami]

Now then... we should get going. Sumire-kun's waiting on us.


I, THAT, POSE, KANNA, WHA(ry















o-okay i think i'm better now LET'S KEEP GOING



[Ogami]

Kanna? What's wrong, are you wounded?




[Ogami]

(Looks like it was a tough battle... she might have missed a hit...)


[Ogami]

Kanna... hang in there!


[Kanna]

... Captain. I got one request to make of you...


[Ogami]

What is it?




[Kanna]

She... even though she's always like that... she gets lonely. So she'll need you to look out for her.




[Ogami]

Kanna... as expected, you're worried about Sumire-kun, aren't you.



----


[Ogami]

..........


C'mon. Eh? Eeeeeeeeh?

[Kanna]

Honestly... at this rate, I guess won't be able to just keel over quietly, huh.


[Ogami]

Well, that's how it is. We'll be able to make our way out of here, so... until then, do your best.



----


[Ogami]

Aah, nothing to worry about.



----


[Ogami]

Now now, that's enough of that. By the way, Kanna. What's with all these wrecked Wakiji...?




[Kanna]

Though... as far as opponents go, these guys weren't nearly enough. I was just beating down peons...


----
[Ogami]

Kanna, there are like... twenty billion dead Wakiji in this building. Explanation. Now.


[Kanna]

A'right, let's see... so I was just walking around, minding my own business, when--




[Kanna]

WHAM! A gazillion Wakiji storm in on me and force me to respond with brutal force and unnecessary violence!


[Ogami]

... the truth, Kanna.


[Kanna]

... alright, fine, fine. Lessee...




[Kanna]

-- right? So then I went to see what it was, and--




[Kanna]

BAM! Wakiji. So I had to kill 'em.


[Ogami]

But... but this is a stealth mission. So why--


[Kanna]

Ha ha ha! Say no more, Captain, I was just doin' what you told me to do.


[Ogami]

Wait... what?


[Kanna]

Oh, yeah. See, I was just thinking 'what if I had a little Captain in me--'


[Ogami and Sumire]

What!?


[Kanna]

'-- and what would he say?', y'know?


[Sumire]

Oh. Oh, I thought for a minute there, you--


[Ogami]

Would you LIKE to have a little Ogami in y--


[Sumire]

ENSIGN!


[Ogami]

Alright, fine, fine. So? What'd you think that I would have done?




[Ogami]

...


[Kanna]

Right?


[Ogami]

Let's... let's just say that it COULD have happened if someone had lobotomized me and leave it at that. What next?


[Kanna]

Right, right. Well...



----


[Kanna]

... they didn't really have a lot of time to react, so even though there were like twenty of them--



----


[Kanna]

Violence!




[Kanna]

Thought I'd have it a bit easier from there on out, but it turns out that...




[Kanna]

-- that wasn't the main body of their forces.



----


[Kanna]

I had to escape into another room. That kinda sucked, but hey, 'least until you offered to be my daddy.


[Ogami]

I-- what?


[Kanna]

Yeah! Here:



---


[Kanna]

See?


[Ogami]

(... I'm kind of afraid to ask why she has photographic proof of her own 'what would Ogami do' conjectures.)


[Kanna]

So, anyway, THAT made me feel a bit better, just in time to watch a Wakiji bust down the door and try to wrassle me.




BAM!



[Wakiji]

Gigigi--!!


[Ogami]

What, just one Wakiji? That couldn't have been--




[Ogami]

... oh.


[Kanna]

Yeah, I was still kinda tired, an' that might've been the end of the line...



----


[Wakiji]

Gi... ghk...


[Kanna]

And then the ghost loli came in and crushed their minds and I killed 'em and THE END!


[Ogami]

That's... that's great, Kanna.


[Ogami]

Actually, wait-- that kinda IS! Now that we've wiped out the Hive of Darkness's scouts, all we have to do is call down the rest of the Flower Division and we can get a sneak attack on whatever forces that the Hive of Darkness has left in the--

----



----
[Ogami]

ghgkkhaksjdfjfghgdKAAAAANNNNNNNNAAAAAAA!!

-----



NEXT TIME: HURR


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